Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking, so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same….
- Marianne Williamson

This passage from Marianne Williamson has been kicking my butt for 30 years.  I love it so much that I finally had it made into a giant canvas that hangs in my office. The message challenges, comforts and confuses me, all at the same time. 

Guru google defines "playing small" as “intentionally diminishing oneself; shying away from showcasing your true capabilities and/or accomplishments.”   Why do we do this?   Why do we question our potential to be “brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous” and then recede into the shadows of our own lives?  

My challenge is…I have a complicated relationship with the concept of “shining”.   

Self-promotion triggers a visceral werewolf response within me.  I hate it in myself.  I hate it in others.  Ingrained in the deepest parts of my identity is the expectation that we are “supposed to be humble” and humility means muting your successes and letting your work speak for itself.   Being humble means not being seen and giving myself “permission to shine” risks violating those values.  The irony that I have wallpapered my office with a message that champions this very concept is not lost on me – but it was this message that first encouraged me to challenge the truth of my own belief system.  Here’s what I’ve learned.  

“We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’  Actually, who are we NOT to be?  We are all children of God”, fearfully and wonderfully made with meticulous intention, are we not?  Absolutely we are – and while we are taught to value humility as an admirable character trait - somewhere along the way, we have been taught (explicitly or implicitly) that “shining” is inherently wrong and “humility” became confused with “hiding”.   

So what does the Bible really teach us about humility?

Returning to the guru commonly referred to as google, Humility is defined as “maintaining a realistic understanding of oneself as not being inherently superior to others.  Building on that truth, Biblical humility is about seeing ourselves clearly—our strengths and our flaws—– through the lens of our relationship with God and those around us.  What the Bible actually teaches is that our talents and successes aren’t just for us.  They’re gifts, meant to be shared.  

We all have something remarkable inside of us.  Everything that makes you fantastic – all of your strengths, skills, and accomplishments—have been given to you for a purpose and are part of a much bigger plan.  One that involves inspiring those around you and making a meaningful difference in this world.  

You might be wondering, “where’s the part that says you need to downplay your abilities, stay out of the spotlight, and not mention your achievements to avoid looking arrogant and prideful?”  Haven’t found it.  What I HAVE found is some core guidance on what Humility is NOT:

Humility does not mean silencing your success. Acknowledging your accomplishments does not equate to pride.  However, the way you acknowledge your accomplishments matters.  The Bible encourages us to acknowledge our successes in a way that feels genuine and respectful to the contributions of others. Focus on the teamwork involved, the lessons learned, and how your experiences can empower others. 

Humility is not downplaying your worth.  Downplaying our skills or accomplishments does not make us more humble.  True humility is not about being less; it’s about being real—appreciating your value exactly as it is – and recognizing your worth without feeling the need to compare or compete with others.  Humility means knowing you’re a masterpiece without needing to compare it to the gallery next door.

Humility does not equate to invisibility. Being humble doesn’t mean keeping yourself invisible or not taking up space. It isn’t shrinking to make others feel better—it’s knowing your worth and using it to empower others. It involves sharing the stage and using your visibility in such a way that others feel encouraged to step forward too.  

Your shine doesn’t have to diminish your humility.  They can coexist.  True humility does not require us to pretend our light doesn’t exist and our shine doesn’t have to diminish our humility.  There is a way to shine without arrogance, to celebrate our gifts without diminishing others, and to own our light without casting shadows on anyone else.

"We are all meant to shine, as children do," without second-guessing ourselves.  That being said, we weren’t created to downplay our strengths or fade into the backdrop of our own stories any more than we were made to parade across life’s stage basking in the glow of our own greatness.  It's vital to recognize the line between understanding your worth and strutting around like a peacock, flaunting every accomplishment. These two are not the same, so don’t get them twisted.  

“We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”    THIS is the trait the Bible champions: a powerful, purpose-driven humility that celebrates individual gifts while building community and collective growth.  Shining isn't about you. It's about us. It's about what your light unlocks in the people around you.

My playing small isn't serving anyone—not the world, not the people I’m called to inspire, not even myself.  It has only ever served my fears.  This year, I’m challenging myself to rethink what it really means to shine.  What does it look like to “step into my potential”?  How can you live so fully in your light that it inspires others to find and embrace their own?  It sounds pretty but how do you even begin to live that concept out in your everyday life?   

I have no idea.  

I just know that I’m committed to living unapologetically as myself, a child of God, sharing not just my successes, but the struggles and setbacks along the way.  So, here I am, for every person who’s ever doubted their right to shine. Keep going, my friend.  Your light isn't just for you—let’s light this place up, let’s be seen, and let’s empower others to shine right alongside us.