Craving an identity is natural; it provides us with a sense of safety and clarity.  Our identity becomes the framework that we use to understand ourselves and our place in the world.  It helps us navigate life with a sense of direction and purpose.  We define who we think we are by our roles, achievements, and relationships. But these identities can become cages when we get too attached to them.  We cling to these identities as solid and sacred, but in truth, they are fluid and ever-evolving. 

I’ve spent much of my life grappling with the concept of "identity," and it has always felt like chasing something just beyond my reach—something solid and unchanging. But what I’ve come to realize is that identity isn’t a fixed point to be captured. Identity is more like a journey, than a destination.

“I have been a thousand different women, and I will become a thousand more.”

This is more than the title to a beautiful poem by Emory Hall; it’s a mantra and a belief that has profoundly transformed how I see myself, how I approach decisions, and how I feel about the future. 

In this context, this current version of me is an evolution of my lifetime of experiences, choices and growth.  Each past self flows and converges into the vast ocean of who I am today and who I have yet to become.  

So, who are you? Who have you been? Who are you becoming? Let’s dig deeper into this with a reflection exercise…

Close your eyes and let yourself feel the presence of the countless versions of you that have existed throughout your life. 

The ones who triumphed with pride and the ones who struggled in silence. The versions of you that faced pain so deep you wish to forget. The ones that stood fiercely in battle, winning with grace or losing with bitter disappointment. The ones who loved with all their heart, only to have it broken and pieced back together time and time again. The ones who stood tall in moments of success, and the ones you’ve hidden away, tucked out of sight from shame, guilt, or self doubt. And let’s not forget the cringeworthy ones— that make you wonder, “What was I thinking?!” 

Each version of you has played a critical role in your development, providing invaluable lessons, strength, and resilience. Reflect on the courage and wisdom each past self carried. Consider what each version has done for your growth–how she supported you, how she fought for you, and even how she may have hurt you. 

This is an invitation to embrace all versions of yourself, past and present, light and shadow.  We get so focused on where we want to be that we miss the beauty in where we are right now and how we got here.  We wish we had done more, become more, seen more.  We see mistakes in our past or missed opportunities and we judge our former selves through the lens of the wisdom we hold today. But the mistakes of your past are not weapons to be used against your present self.  It is our failures that are our greatest teachers when we allow ourselves to sit with them openly and without judgment.  

Release your attachment to outcomes that didn’t happen the way you wanted. Each past self is a teacher, a guardian, a piece of your sacred journey. Forgive what needs forgiving, celebrate the wins, grieve where it hurts and have compassion for the versions of you who didn’t know what you know now.  

Embrace your evolution. Don't let the fear of losing one identity keep you from discovering another. Think of it like your taste in music. Your identity is your current playlist, always being updated. Sometimes you're adding new tracks that reflect who you're becoming, sometimes you're skipping over songs you've outgrown, and other times you're hitting repeat on old favorites that remind you of where you've been. And let's be real—sometimes you're throwing in a weird, random song, just because it feels right in the moment!

Within the woman you are today, you hold the collective wisdom of all the women you have been. They speak collectively through your intuition and that quiet voice that comes from deep within. Trust them and allow them to lead you toward your most powerful self. They are your faithful guides and most devoted allies.

Can you feel the depth of the collective wisdom, and the strength all of these versions have given you? Each one matters. Each version has taught you, protected you, and made you who you are today. And by embracing all that you have been, you also empower yourself with a deeper knowing of who you are choosing to become.  

You have been a thousand different women, and you will become a thousand more. 

There’s a beautiful freedom to that– own it! This isn’t just a reflection; it's a full-on celebration! A tribute to the resilience, courage, and endless capacity for transformation that lies within you.